The kids have enjoyed a wonderful week at VBS!! Every year they have a picnic on Friday and we eat dinner outside and then go into the church for the program...basically we sing the songs they have sung all week and then they talk about the money they raised for the missions. Which by the way is amazing! Every year they chose a missions project and this year it was kids helping feed kids. There goal was $3000! On Thursday they only had 900 and something...God is good! By Friday they had well exceeded the $3000 and over 600 children attended this year!
I, being the "great" mom I am :), forgot to take my camera and take pictures of the boys. But I did get some pictures with the boys and the sunglasses they made (which Isaac insists on wearing everywhere!) Oh yeah, he's the picture on the bottom.
Ok, so I really have lots to say but not many words to say it in. So please excuse me while my brain is still trying to figure some things out, but sometimes it helps me to blog about it while I'm thinking about it. I'm sure I'll be doing some editing after posting! haha When I read Mari's blog (sorry I'm not sure on how to link it) this morning it really struck me. Then, at church the message was about relationships...come one seriously! My mind is still going and I'm still processing everything, but when he asked about being an encourager or a discourager it really got me thinking. I am an encourager to everyone else BUT myself. Yeah thats right. I am lousy at encouraging myself. So...most of you know that I am struggling to open up with other people, the minute I start to, I tell myself that my problems aren't as bad as everyone elses...not anyone else. And Mari, I can completely identify with being so emotionally drained that you don't even want to try. Anytime you want to talk or get together I'm up for it! :)
This relationship thing is new to me. It is something that I have been longing for, but I am so used to just sitting and feeling lonely. That has to stop! I am really learning to reach out in this time for me...even when I tell myself the ENTIRE time (which I know is a LIE!) that its worthless and seriously..how can they really care. But I'm going to start trying anyway!! I have to say that it is getting a little easier as I do it. :) I HATE telling others how I'm feeling and feel like it is putting them in the middle of things (just go with me here as I'm not ready to share that yet) and feel awful. I WANT to be the happy person I was once! I WANT to have relationships and friends! I WANT to be able to encourage myself!! But I am coming to realize that this is where I am RIGHT NOW! It is was it is!
So on that note... thanks everyone for reading and bearing with me. This blog is an outlet for me in helping me step out and be transparent a little more without feeling awkward doing it face to face. I have come to realize though that sometimes I use it (and email) for relationships so that I don't have to step out of my box. Not good, I know. :)
I'm off to enjoy this beautiful Sunday! I hope everyone else does the same!
Loves~
Oh...more sleeping pictures! ENJOY!! :)
7 comments:
Thank you so much, April, for your words of encouragement. We will definitely have to get together sometime! I am officially done with school until July 21st so my evenings and weekends can finally be used to relax for awhile!
Oh my goodness! You with the sleeping pictures...I only WISH Ruby would stay asleep if I took a picture of her. I love these pictures!!! LOVE THEM! :)
And, as to everything else, it may be hard to believe, but we do, WE DO, care. I do. I love hanging out with you and your kids. I love getting to know you more. I'm so glad God brought you into my Elston family. You know how to reach me. Just let me know when you need to hang out.
I hope that I helped tonight, and You know that I dont mind. And I am SORRY that I wont be there next week but maybe that will be what you need to be more transparent.
Love ya
I think many of us can relate at being discouraging to ourselves...especially when things are already tough. Satan loves to isolate us and make us feel like we are the only people experiencing things...or that people would be shocked/ burdened/ overhwelmed/ disgusted by our problems if we shared them. I am slowly learning that once many of my problems are in the open, Satan loses his power over them because he operates in the dark. Of course, some problems everyone can know about and others I just share with a close friend...and that's okay. :)
I have LOVED reading your blog over the past month or so and getting to know you better. I honestly consider you a good friend now...and a large part of how I have gotten to know you has been through your words here. :) Isn't that so funny?
Anyway, I hope that I can join you on a water walk soon. :)
Sounds like the boys had a blast at VBS :-)
I think many of us can relate to being others' biggest fans and not cheering/encouraging ourselves on! I think this blog ends up being a good stepping stone for you to start opening up with others more and forming closer relationships...all of it will then develop more in person :-) I can be an introvert as well, especially depending on the make-up of the group and the subject matter. I am one who doesn't often seek out asking others to socialize much...although I think I'm improving. It's not that I LOVE being home alone with Alex all of the time...I enjoy a nice balance, but I'm not sure why I don't make more of an effort to ask others to get together.
Anyway...I can definitely tell, just through your writing/thoughts in the last several blog posts, that you are growing in this area, April!
Hugs girl...((HUGS))!!!
The pics are sooo cute. The 2nd to last one (can't even tell which kiddo) doesn't even look like either of the twins with no bangs-how funny!
Anyway, hope to catch up with you soon (when we are less contagious of course).
I wasn't able to listen to Pastor Randy's message yesterday. I had some raw emotions and issues that have just surfaced and couldn't focus. I had to step out and take a moment with a couple friends. I plan to borrow a copy of it to listen to soon.
Letting light into your pain will bring healing(I know from personal experience). Through private time with GOD and knowing that YOUR FRIENDS are accepting and available for YOU!! Your pain, hurt, and issues are valid and important.
Hugs~
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